PT Phone Home

I haven’t been to the gym in quite a while. Joe the Trainer selfishly abandoned all his clients to become a medic in the United States Army (really? that’s more rewarding than watching me fall off a balance ball?) And the gym just isn’t fun without someone there yelling at you.

But I figured I should start up again. So I went back and asked to renew my membership. A rather wide but friendly gentleman assisted me. I told him my situation and asked if he knew Joe the Trainer. He did not, but told me “If you’re interested in PT we’re running an incredible deal... three sessions for 99 dollars.” I thought it was a little weird how he kept calling it “PT” - a little too hip for me. But I told him “that is a really good deal, I’ll take you up on that.”

Wide Guy continued “yeah, you get three half-hours of PT for 99 bucks...” I stopped him there. “Hang on a sec... Thirty minute sessions? That’s actually not a very good deal.” He asked me “well, what does that come up to as an hourly rate? I mean, how would you even divide that?”

“Oh, my steroid-loving friend, let me explain it to you.” (OK, I didn’t really say that, and he wasn’t THAT huge, but come on... seriously?) I told him “that’s 66 dollars an hour.” He looked at me puzzled and said “wow, that’s not very good at all! I don’t know why they’d even do a deal like that.”

Now the thing is, it’s not a terrible rate. It’s more than I paid Joe the Trainer, but I know other trainers charge $75-$100 or more per hour. It’s just not a good promotional rate. Last time I renewed my membership, they offered me four PT sessions - for free. THAT’S what a promotional deal is supposed to be. Also, I would rather pay extra money and get a full one-hour session than these mini-workouts. It’s going to take me more than 30 minutes to explain all of my workout neuroses to a new trainer so the half-hour sessions are a waste.

Regardless, I have to get in better shape before I get a trainer to get me in shape. No sense in me (overly) embarrassing myself.